I think one very important thing about me is that I am a hopeless romantic. I am a sucker for romance, therefore the majority of the tv and books I watch and read are romance. There is no romance in it? I will probably not enjoy it as much. I don't know where this originates from, but I just do. Another thing about me is that I come from an extremely Machista country, which Dr. A has talked about in class. One of the consequences of machismo is that men are allowed to get away with many things, in specific for this blog post, cheating.
When your partner cheats, how you react and the decisions you make regarding your marriage are completely up to you, but when I was a kid I did not think that way. I remember when I was around 10 I was having a conversation at lunchtime with my friends about marriage and my friend said "Your husband will cheat. There is nothing we can do about it, it's just going to happen, it's not
enough reason to get a divorce cause otherwise we will be single all our life" At the time, I agreed with her but as the year passed, I realized that it is complete bs. Regardless, growing up I saw and heard many cases of cheating which made it seem common and acceptable. One example would be my parents, my mom met my dad, a married man, and he swept her off her feet. After many years of ups and downs, they got married when I was 12. This story is pretty common in telenovelas, it is a challenge where the main couple has to break a marriage to get their breakthrough. One example would be La Mujer Perfecta or Cosita Rica where it was the main plot and it didn't get as much interest as the subplot because it was a very common challenge. In addition, even though the ex-wife was not the romantic point of the story, she still fought really hard to keep her husband even though he was seeing somebody else on the side, and she was viewed as evil for that (sometimes she was evil for more things though). Growing up watching these shows and saying many similar cases in real-life has a big impact on how you see relationships.
The viewpoint I had on relationships and marriage has changed significantly as I grew up. Before, being the hopeless romantic I am, I considered these stories to be super romantic, but what is romantic about being with a married guy? Or what is so romantic about staying with a guy that cheated on you? I believe that the reason why these plots are so successful is due to the machismo that is ingrained by our society, therefore to break these I think we should stop romanticizing this toxic behavior in the media that we consume the most. I am still glad some people make their relationship work, like my parents and many of the happy endings in the telenovelas, but just because it worked for them, it doesn't make it acceptable.
Standing ovation, Nicole !!!!!
ReplyDeleteNicole!!! I loved how you articulated your points so clearly and stood up for what you believed in! It was so refreshing to read how your opinions went against the standard of women just accepting their circumstances and being powerful and fighting for a good, healthy relationship instead of the toxic relationships that are so often portrayed in the media. I honestly hadn't really realized until you pointed it out so clearly, the thing that makes these relationships so interesting to watch is that they are toxic in some way. We are surrounded by these relationships that are artificial and are manipulated to maintain our interest and we can't help but romanticize them and try to emulate them in our relationships. I think more people should question that model, as you have, and expect more from their relationships. Great job in this post! I loved reading it!
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